千祈唔好玩塔羅牌,因為……

文: 9527
2016.05.24

文:B612

圖:Flickr@Dana Beveridge

如同邊一個發明了返工。我一直都好唔明白,到底係邊個發明紫微斗數、算命睇相、塔羅牌之類嘅嘢。

占卜呢家嘢係無得輸嘅。收你幾舊水,答幾條問題:「今年一二月、七八月、十一二月都有機會發展喎,睇你識唔識把握啦!」完全係無位入,因為點都一定啱。

 

其實,我唔係想話啲風水佬、占卜師會呃你十年八年。相反,我係因為覺得算命太準,先以後唔敢再玩。

第一次去玩塔羅牌,係同我前度去嘅。嗰時感情有啲暗湧,有晚食完飯經過廟街,我提議一齊去玩占卜。我好清楚,自己其實係想借怪力亂神說服佢。話唔定會算到我係佢真命天子,而佢又真係信呢?幾大就幾大啦。

結果,阿廟街玲姐,竟然當住我面同我前度講:「而家同你糾纏緊嗰兩個都唔係喎,你兩個都唔好揀啦。」喂!咁即係playXme姐!話晒都係我出錢占卜,你而家咁樣兜口兜面hurt我天理何在呀?

 

跟住輪到我。最精彩嘅係,佢,竟然,話,我嘅感情,係好坎坷曲折,唔到38歲都唔洗旨意會穩定落嚟。38歲……38歲呀!

到底有咩仆X得過,你明明已經覺得自己都被個天玩夠喇啩,浮浮沉沉咗七、八年,咩嘢感情挫折都經歷過晒,好想安定落嚟,然後佢話俾你聽 —— 唔好意思,其實,你條命係要衰多十年先可以修成正果。

 

當時嘅我,係決定唔信佢講嘅嘢。有一個理論叫做「自我應驗預言(self-fulfilling prophecy)」,大概係話自己一個人對事情嘅期望,係會影響到事情嘅發展。有人同你講你一定唔會升職做到腦細架喇,所以你都覺得自己唔會,無謂嘥心機捱眼瞓直接放pea,最後當然真係做唔到啦。問題係,到底係你本身真係唔得,定係因為佢咁講完先唔得?如果無人咁同你講過,會唔會喺另一個平行時空,其實你係做到架呢?

唉我唔理,總之嗰時,我好努力修補同前度嘅關係,都過咗一兩年蜜月期架,我仲大膽到同佢求婚,一切都好似漸入佳境咁。而下場好明顯啦,佢咪就係做咗我前度囉。

同佢分手之後,我又拍咗陣散拖,然後遇到而家呢個女朋友。距離38歲大限,仲有好Q咁多年,但係,我已經好想同佢步入人生另一個階段,一齊生活。

而且,我好想打破「38歲」呢個詛咒。

 

有啲嘢,見過鬼就自然怕黑。我唔係好敢俾壓力我女朋友,但時不時都會提起,不如搬出嚟一齊住,好過大家晚晚OT到天昏地暗,好日都唔見一次。

咩都準備好晒,地方搵咗,傢俬都諗埋,只欠東風。我甚至已經幻想到,我哋每個weekend去超市買餸返屋企煮飯嘅畫面。

前晚,繼我哋連續OT咗八日無見之後,臨收工,我收到女朋友嘅訊息:「James,對唔住……我諗過,我而家真係無精神力氣去照顧另一個人,又或者去迎接新嘅生活。可能係我哋認識嘅timing唔夠好,我做唔到。對唔住。」

 

果然。我就知道個天對我無咁好死架喇。到底當日幫我占卜嘅係玲姐定霞姨,準定唔準,我真係唔知。不過計一計……嗯,仲有八年零三個月又十七日,38歲其實都好快到姐……

 

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作者的其他文章:
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>> 去旅行唔是奉旨幫你代購的

 

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